so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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