I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Everyone says I win the strip club
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
