I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
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