i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
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