I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
