I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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