id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
