That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Operation Purity has been aborted
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Is her dick bigger than yours?
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