so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
