It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize
