I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
