Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Randomize
