Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
How's work?
Spinning.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Randomize
