sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
