Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I'm sobbing to NWA
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Randomize
