Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
