Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
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