and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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