Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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