My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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