Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Let's get the cat blown out
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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