i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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