break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
