wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize
