if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
