The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Randomize
