Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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