My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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