Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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