I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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