I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
Randomize
