Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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