I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
