U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
