Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Randomize
