I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
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