How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
