You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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