Soap is not a condiment
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
You left your phone here
Wait...
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
