new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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