wake up i wanna do it froggy style
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Randomize
