I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
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