there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize
