Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I need to calm my uterus...
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
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