i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Randomize
