i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
My butt remains clenched, sir.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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