Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Randomize
