i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
She's just so happy...and so naked.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
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