there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
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