C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
